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Weathering the Seasons of Motherhood with Kristin Kennedy

Podcasts

April 3, 2023

Young me is having a pinch me moment – Kristin Kennedy, the editor-in-chief of Seventeen Magazine, is on the pod today! In addition to her high profile career within the celebrity and fashion worlds, Kristin is also a mom of three, so she absolutely understands the juggling act between motherhood and work. Kristin and I have a great conversation about the challenging realities of motherhood, how her relationship with alcohol shifted once she became a parent, and what it’s like behind the scenes of her seemingly glamorous career. 

Follow Kristin on Instagram at @kristinmkennedy and at her fashion blog, Closet Full of Clothes.

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Transcript:

Speaker 1 (00:04):

Hi, welcome to the Sober Mom Life podcast. I’m your host Suzanne of my kind of suite and the sober mom life on Instagram. If you are a mama who has questioned your relationship with alcohol at times, if you’re wondering if maybe it’s making motherhood harder, this is for you. I will be having candid, honest, funny conversations with other moms who have also thought, Hmm, maybe motherhood is better without alcohol. Is it possible we’ll chat and we’ll talk about all things sobriety and how we’ve found freedom in sobriety. I don’t consider myself an alcoholic. You don’t have to either. And maybe life is brighter without alcohol. I hope you will join us on this journey and I’m so excited to get started.

(00:58)
Hello, happy Monday. Welcome back to the podcast. We are just fresh off of a just a three day trip to Palm Springs. I feel refreshed, I’ll continue to say it. There’s nothing like a sober vacation. Nothing like coming home from a vacation and not needing a vacation from your vacation. <laugh>, how many times can I say vacation? I am very excited about today’s episode. I have to tell you, let’s see, probably 14 year old me would be pinching myself as I sit in my room in a small town in Wisconsin, dreaming of a much bigger life and getting lost in the pages of 17 magazine. If you were a kid in the nineties, if you were a teen in the nineties, 17 magazine to you was probably the Bible before I graduated to, you know, Vogue and Vanity Fair. It was 17, I think 17 helped me feel normal.

(02:03)
They talked about all of the things that you were afraid to talk about with your mom or your parents, or even your friends, and you can read about it. In 17 Magazine, they gave us a peek into celebrity’s lives before social media, before there was this 24 hour news coverage. I mean, I waited for that magazine to come out and it was my Bible. And so the fact that I get to sit down and talk to Kristen Kennedy, who is the current editor-in-chief of 17 Magazine, blew my mind. We’ve followed each other for a while on Instagram. I love her style. She’s just very, she’s that effortlessly cool, very chic. And every time she pops up in my feed, I mean, I just, I love what she’s wearing. She also has a blog where she shares, it’s called Closet Full of Clothes and she shares her outfits.

(02:56)
So yes, we talk about, you know, her going to New York Fashion Week and all of the glamorous stuff because her life really does seem glamorous. But we also talk about motherhood and she’s a mom of three and she struggles with the mom things just like you and I do. And the the guilt and the how do we balance and juggle everything that were meant to juggle. And we talk about alcohol and you guys, she’s met some celebrities. We talk about the celebrities she’s met who doesn’t drink, and that you would be surprised in this day and age of glamorizing alcohol, it’s really astounding how many glamorous people don’t drink. And I think we’re seeing that now too, with the headlines that come out of all the sober celebrities. Katie Perry just announced she’s sober. Drew Barrymore, Demi Lovato, there are all these celebrities who don’t drink, and we talk about that.

(03:51)
And Kristen doesn’t drink much. And she talks about that too. I love this conversation because it’s about everything. It’s not just about sobriety. It’s about how we can be amazing moms and yet sometimes still feel like we’re failing. And it’s just a very real convo with someone who I admire. And I’m really excited for you guys to hear it. Before we get into the episode, just some quick housekeeping stuff. Be sure to go follow us on Patreon at the sober mom life. It’s patreon.com/the sober mom life that is linked in the show notes. That’s where you’re gonna get all of the bonus episodes. So we have two bonus episodes a week. We also have a meeting that meets every Friday at 11:00 AM central time. We have Discord so you guys can chat with each other. We have a book club starting this Wednesday. We’re gonna go over Laura McCowen’s book.

(04:44)
It’s a six week book club that we’ll meet every Wednesday night, 7:00 PM Central. That’s all through Patreon. And also the real sober moms are coming back. They are first going to be able, you’re gonna hear them through Patreon before you can hear them on the feed on this podcast. And so if you want to binge real life stories, you’re gonna be able to do that on Patreon. Also, if you wanna sign up to share your story, that is through Patreon. Everything is through Patreon. I’m trying to keep this space ad free, but you know, as with anything, this takes resources, time and all of that. And so I’m just so excited that you guys have decided to support us over there. That’s how I’m able to keep doing this. So thank you. Thank you. Make sure you follow me at my kind of suite for a picture of a full sober life and join our Facebook group, the Sober Mom life, to connect with a whole community. I think we’re up to almost 12,000 moms of sober and sober curious moms. Without judgment, it’s the most supportive place on the internet. Okay, now let’s get to Kristen Kennedy.

(05:59)
Christian, thank you so much for being here. I was just saying, I’m so excited to hear all about your life because it seems very glamorous,

Speaker 2 (06:08):

<laugh> so funny. Well, I’m so excited to be here. Um, I love following you and um, so thank you for having me. Yeah, my life is not glamorous. I actually think I have like s snot on me because somebody is always sick in my house. Um, and currently that’s my 10 month old. Um, but thank you

Speaker 1 (06:28):

<laugh>. Oh my God. Well, you say it’s not glamorous, but I saw your stories yesterday. You went to New York Fashion Week preview. Like I get it though. Like I get from Instagram and from stories, like things are not what they seem. Right. But from the outside, you’re the editor-in-Chief of 17 Magazine, which I have to say my 15 year old self is like going crazy because 17 was my bible when I was in the middle of nowhere, Wisconsin. Right,

Speaker 2 (06:56):

Same. I I grew up in Chicago, like a Midwestern girl too, and like 17. Um, I always wanted to work in magazines. Cuz for me that was like where I got my advice. Like I had acne and like I read every, like, tried everything. I didn’t know how to talk to boys or deal with friend drama or I wanted to look like, like this stylish, I loved fashion and like, you know, we were everyone kind of dressed the same at my school. So I loved like reading the pages and looking at all this, you know, outfits and beauty chips. It

Speaker 1 (07:28):

Was, oh my God. Yeah, it was like a portal I looked up this morning cuz I was like, I just so remember like sitting on my bedroom floor and paging through 17. So I looked up some of the covers from like the early nineties and it took me right back, you know, the Natalie Portman’s, Claire Dan, like, it’s just, oh my god. Alicia Silverstone.

Speaker 2 (07:50):

Oh, Claire, Dan, my so-called Life, oh

Speaker 1 (07:53):

The best. Jordan Cata clueless,

Speaker 2 (07:56):

Oh my God,

Speaker 1 (07:58):

The, just the best. And it did make me feel like, okay, I was no longer in, you know, this small town Wisconsin. I was like, it just brought me away from my life and it seemed so glamorous. And so then when I, I can’t remember when you and I started following each other, but it’s been a while.

Speaker 2 (08:16):

You know what, I was think I was thinking about that this morning, I think it’s when you were pregnant with your third and I was pregnant at the same time with my second. And I think somehow I found you and I was like, oh, somebody else who’s like in the exact same situation. And um, I just loved like yes, having those conversations and like, you were so real. And I was like, this is somebody who’s like, I think it was like right before the pandemic, so, um, before the world changed,

Speaker 1 (08:43):

I remember seeing your name pop up and I was like, oh my God, the editor-in-chief of 17 Magazine, I was starstruck. I was just like, and so it’s so interesting that it seems like there are two sides, right? So you’re like, you have this really powerful job and you are, you know, just high profile in that sense. And then you do share a lot of the motherhood and like we talk about that over DM of like the shit show of trying to get our kids ready in the morning. So you and I like have bonded, uh, in dms about just the shit show of motherhood and like how hard it is. And I think just in my head, the editor-in-chief of 17 Magazine isn’t dealing with these things <laugh>, but the reality of it is you are <laugh>.

Speaker 2 (09:32):

Yes. I think that’s why I talk about it. It’s funny cuz I have this vision too of what my life would look like when I had kids and it was gonna be glamorous and there was gonna be, and it doesn’t matter, I think like where you are in life or even like how much help or not help you have or whatever. Motherhood is so overwhelming. It’s such a shit show. It’s so much. And I had my first and I was so overwhelmed and then I went back to work and it’s kind of like you’re just expected to like, you know, like getting ready in the mornings and like trying to get there in time when you had a baby and I was still nursing and like figuring that out and like packing my pump and all these things that are like, not glamorous,

Speaker 1 (10:12):

Oh my God.

Speaker 2 (10:12):

But I’m was expected to show up and look like a certain way and be on panels or like, I remember, um, pretty Little Liars was really big at the time when we had the cats coming in. I was supposed to interview them and I just like, it was like a crazy morning and I like didn’t wanna leave my baby. And um, so it was just like one of those things where I like realized there weren’t, nobody was talking about it. And so I, you know, would talk to like other moms at work and kind of, and then everyone’s like, yes, this is like impossible. It’s a totally, you know, like of course I, I feel the same way and I’m like, but but you look so everything looks great. Um, which I think is power to like speaks to like what us as like, you know, women, we just keep going.

(10:53)
But I feel like there’s a community whether like, it doesn’t matter what kind of work, whether you work in the home or outside or wherever, it’s like trying to keep it all together and keep all those balls in the air, um, is so hard. And it’s something like I feel comfort and talking about. Um, but I also like part of me, I just like, you know, I like to share and like, you know, talk to people, you know, at that stage in my life I had just like was pregnant with my second and just kind of looking around for like other moms that like, I was like, I need, you know, like that support. Yeah. Or just to like, what are you, what are you wearing right now during this stage of your pregnancy? Or like, what are you buying for the baby? Or you know, all those things or how do you deal with like this crazy tantrum because yeah, <laugh> what the expert is saying I should do, you know that book I read on the Subway that’s not working.

Speaker 1 (11:43):

No, the experts don’t have babies anymore. It’s very clear that like experts wait until their babies are grown to write a book because you can’t write a book like that when you have a baby. Those experts aren’t in it. They don’t know. No,

Speaker 2 (11:56):

You don’t remember it. No. And honestly like, I don’t have time, you know, like to read like I, you know, like people are like, oh, read this and sleep train stuff. And I, you know, things are so busy and like just getting through like work and kids and all that. I’m like, I don’t have time for that. So it, it’s like to, you know, follow along the other moms same thing and like read their q and As or DM them and say like, how, wait, how did you sleep train? Or what was that thing you did again? Or like, how did you make that bath work or whatever. I get those like, it’s like talking to a friend, right. You know? And at the time when I had my first and my second, we were living this city and I didn’t have this like community of moms.

(12:32)
Like I had my work colleagues and like so much of my social life and life was around work. Just, you know, like whenever I wasn’t working I wanted to be home with my kids. And a lot of my job is, you know, sometimes like mornings and evenings a little less so, um, since Covid. But you know, a lot of our friends who had had kids had moved out to the suburbs or didn’t have kids yet. So I found like online is sort of like this nice community and you could also be a little more real that like sometimes I didn’t wanna bitch my friends.

Speaker 1 (13:00):

Yeah, no, it’s so true. Yeah, those online communities, I think Instagram saved me for sure in like that first baby, like you said, it, it rocked my world. Like I was not prepared. And it also, like none of my friends were really saying that either my friends didn’t have babies yet or they seemed like they were doing fine. And then I was like, wait, what’s wrong with me that this is like really existentially hard.

Speaker 2 (13:28):

I had a really hard time too. And then also I felt like no one was really talking about like transition back to work or like, you know, even the simple things like, um, I had a colleague who had a baby after me and she was like, how do you get ready in the morning? And by then I had figured it out. I was like, okay, so you put the baby in like the pack and play with these toys in the bathroom while you’re doing this, you shower. Like, but you have to wake up at this house. Like, I had this whole like song and dance, but like figuring that out took me so long and was so hard. Sometimes I think like, you know, what you see in like our, you know, my job is like, in many ways I feel like it is very, it’s a dream job like for me and there’s like a lot of amazing parts and glamor to it. And then there’s, it’s, there’s a lot of hard work and stress and things, you know, like any job and so, you know, add motherhood in. I think it’s like any, you know, mom, we’re just like all trying our best.

Speaker 1 (14:20):

Oh my God. Like you have to go interview famous people after <laugh> after having a baby and you have to make sentences work and happen <laugh>

Speaker 2 (14:31):

And the baby like doesn’t know not to spit up on me when I’m wearing my nice clothes, which I, yeah. It’s just, or not to pull the hair. They like my, um, you know, kids love to like touch my hair when it’s done with their sticky fingers. I’m like, oh

Speaker 1 (14:44):

No. It was like, oh my god. Yeah, the baby doesn’t care. I remember that feeling. Yeah. When I had my second baby. And so my first was probably two and a half and I remember specifically the moment, I think it was like my first day home with both kids, which is like, oh my god, that’s just a lot. I asked Harper to do something, my oldest and she was like, no. And I was like, I need your help. And, and that I was like, oh, she doesn’t care. Like she’s not here to help me <laugh>.

Speaker 2 (15:16):

That’s why I had this other one.

Speaker 1 (15:19):

Yeah, you help

Speaker 2 (15:20):

And you do. Like I know,

Speaker 1 (15:22):

I know. I’m like, wait, I thought you were gonna be like a helper role. And I’m like, oh, you still just like, are very selfish. Like you’re supposed to be and you’re still a two and a half year old and you don’t care to like, I’m like, oh, okay. Got it. You don’t care <laugh>. It’s just

Speaker 2 (15:37):

Me. Oh gosh.

Speaker 1 (15:38):

Yeah. Yes. I’m on my own. Yo. So what advice would you give a new mom who is getting back into work and, you know, maternity leave is over and maternity leave itself is so hard. It’s not like she was able to rest and so now she’s gotta go back and she’s as tired as ever as stressed as ever. Like what helped you with that transition? It

Speaker 2 (16:03):

Was really like, I found it really hard. I think some people want that break and that space from their kids and like, thrive off of that. I had like, like I joke with my husband that I’m like co-dependent on my kids. Like I have the, the heart pulls like even, you know, like once I’m there it’s fine, but every day I still have those heart I heart pulls are young. So like that’s part of it. I think for me, what, you know, like I didn’t know if I would go back after I had my son. I was really struggling. I only had like 12 weeks. Um, he seemed so little. I felt like my world was rocked when I had him. He wasn’t sleeping and I knew like, you know, I’d have to jump back in and like there was all these things. There was like travel and this and I, and I just like, was like, how am I gonna do this?

(16:48)
So my husband and I agreed, you can go back for a week and if like you’re like, I can’t do this or like, this isn’t like, we’ll figure it out. Like you can, you know, just try it. So I was like, you know what, I’m gonna give it a little time. Cuz it is hard to make a like clear decision until you try it. And I, I’ve done that with each of my maternity leave. Cause it’s, it’s hard to know like after you add or you change your family dynamic, like what it’s gonna feel like. But I kind of just was like, you know what, I’m gonna try it. And then like a week went and then it, some of it’s nice, like it’s, you know, somebody said to me like, isn’t it nice to like pee and like pee or like, not to like have to like try, you know, like wait until someone’s there to hold the baby or fall asleep or to like eat, like to just like, like have a, you know, a lunch and like not be like, you know, kind of like cramming in food or whatever, leftover.

(17:34)
So there were parts of that that I tried to like hold onto, you know, it was nice to see like my colleagues and get back into it. And I think the hardest hump is like getting to the office. So that I would say like just one foot in front of the other, just, it’s gonna like hard. You’re gonna miss your kids. I sort of try and like compartmentalize. I don’t, like I check in, um, with our nanny, like on the, like how the kids are doing, but I don’t like FaceTime with them and things like that. When I’m at work, I try and like get it in unless like I’m, you know, gonna be out for a while or something and get home. And I think I always, I still feel like a chicken with my head cut off. I feel like I’m doing, you know, like I’m like in the elevator at work ordering groceries or diapers, you know, like it’s amazing how much more efficient you become. I think like once you have kids, I don’t know if you feel this way, but like, what was I doing all day? Like,

Speaker 1 (18:26):

Oh my god, I know. So it’s so true. Like the busier you are the more efficient you have to be. And as moms, whether we work in the home or out of the home, like we’re just always busy. Like it’s just, there’s always, always,

Speaker 2 (18:40):

It’s a mental load and I’ve like really learned to, I think like I, I actually feel like I become a better, like better at my job and better in that sense because like in my career, because like I, you can’t do it all anymore. So I have to like trust my team. I have to like say no to things. I have to like figure out like what is most worth my time and not, and like I just try and get like, my husband’s always like your machine because like he does not think like this. Um, but I’m like ruthlessly efficient. Like I make decisions really quick. I used to like agonize over like, should he be in this summer camp or this or like I can, I can like go down that overanalyze like hole. And I think sometimes I even do it to like make up for the fact that I feel like I’m not there. So like, let me make sure the whatever he’s at while I’m working it’s like so right. I don’t know, you know,

Speaker 1 (19:30):

It’s just perfect. Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (19:31):

And then I mean you, which changes as you have more kids? Like my third kid, you know, like I don’t have time to like agonize over that. So I’m like, you know, what camps are your kid doing? Like, okay, we’re gonna do that one. Like, they’ll be together, that’s fine. We can carle done. Like things like that.

Speaker 1 (19:46):

It’s so true. Like the more kids you have, you realize that motherhood is just so forgiving too. And like, I was so, I put so much pressure on myself with my first kid, which caused like so much anxiety and I just thought I was just like one step away from screwing up and screwing her up and like just making some sort of mistake that, you know, what would forever haunt the both of us. And it’s just like, that’s just not the case.

Speaker 2 (20:16):

I know I have that anxiety too. I think all of us, like a lot of us do, but we don’t like to, we don’t talk about it, it seems like, oh, she always like knows what to do and she, you know, but oh my, I still like, it always keeps me up or like, if I like lose my shit and like, like, oh my God, they’re never gonna, like I yelled at them or like, oh, I didn’t put them in swim lessons of like, now they can’t swim at the pool and like their friends swim and like, what am I, you know, like, and now with my like second I’m definitely like less, you know, like worried and anxious about her and like I’m already feeling with the third that that will be even more so. So it’s, it’s nice because you can kind of be like, as long as they’re loves, like I try and remind myself that, but like of course I’m like still like analyzing everything or like, I didn’t do the art project. Like I’m not an artsy mom and like, you know, there’s so many artsy moms who just like my son had like a hundred day of school project to do and like people just like delivered on that.

Speaker 1 (21:12):

I know that’s a little crazy

Speaker 2 (21:14):

And I hate not delivering on those things and I feel like people expect me to like, you know, like I like and then I’m like, this is not a reflection. Like why do I, why am I like inserting myself as if this is a reflection of me? That’s

Speaker 1 (21:25):

So true though. Yes. Like we do that as moms. It’s our ego, it’s our pride. Like our kids, like I think about that with my kids. Like if they go out with their hair all crazy, I’m like, oh my god, what are people gonna think about me? And I’m like, okay, get over yourself. Like, I have to get over myself because she’s fine. Her hair’s fine, you know, and it’s just not that serious. And yeah, those 100 day things, thank God we’re gonna be at the beach. We’re not even, we’re gonna miss Valentine’s Day and the a hundred days, which I’m like, thank the Lord because

Speaker 2 (21:55):

So smart.

Speaker 1 (21:56):

It’s too much. It’s too much. I, I just sent my best friend in Instagram last night and it was like, you know those over the top like Valentine’s Day crafts and I’m like, who is doing this?

Speaker 2 (22:09):

I know, you know, my son’s teacher emailed the class was like, can we just like, please just make it cards. And I really appreciated that because

Speaker 1 (22:17):

That’s so good. I

Speaker 2 (22:18):

Just feel like it’s gotten, like now you have to have like some cute pun and like with like something attached to it has to have some non-candy toy thing attached to it. That’s funny. That goes with the card now. It’s like become such a Pinterest holiday and yeah, so,

Speaker 1 (22:35):

And it feels like we’re just all maybe afraid of being judged <laugh>. Like does it just come down to that?

Speaker 2 (22:41):

I think so. I, because I’m like, at the end of the day is my son like worried like, oh, they gave me a cool valentine, I did reciprocate. No, he’s like excited that he got the cool Valentine for someone else. Like he couldn’t care less about what he gave everyone else. And here I am like thinking it’s like a reflection of me and I’m like, you know what, it’s gonna be thrown out in two seconds. Yeah. And if like all the other parents think that I suck at giving Valentine’s, like <laugh> do I care. Like, but it’s hard. I still care.

Speaker 1 (23:08):

I know. Yeah. It’s like it takes one mom to be like, Hey guys, could we just all not do this? And probably every mom would be like, oh my god, thank you. Like I was waiting for someone to say this cuz I don’t wanna do this either. It’s kind of like kids’ birthday parties.

Speaker 2 (23:22):

Yeah. I’ve decided with my youngest, like I I’m not gonna introduce these. And we did it same with our, my second was like a pandemic baby, so we kind of had that like, like luck of like, I didn’t really have to like do any party, it was just like always like the family party, the cake and like she didn’t know. So like, you know, she’s three now so she’s just, you know, starting to like understand what birthday parties are. But like, she’s not gonna like request a birthday writing. I’m like, until they request one.

Speaker 1 (23:48):

Like totally. They’re not even gonna remember does it? Isn’t it some, because how old are your kids?

Speaker 2 (23:53):

They are six three in 10 months.

Speaker 1 (23:56):

Oh yeah. They’re not even gonna remember any you guys, they’re not gonna remember what they’re gonna remember from like the first three years of life. And that’s their like foundation is being safe and feeling loved and so like that’s it. They’re not gonna remember all this shit like that. We put such pressure on ourselves and I do it too. And I like, yeah, we gotta let ourselves off the hook. Like how can we let ourselves off the hook?

Speaker 2 (24:21):

You know what kind of like did it for me was we went to this birthday party, I think it might have been two or three, I can’t remember how old the kid was turning. My daughter went and the kid whose birthday party, it was just cried the whole time. Yes. And of course because he is like overwhelmed and like whatever. And I was just like, and the poor parents and I just was like, you know what, my kids probably gonna do that too. And like why? Like, but if you just like are at home with like us or like us and the grandparents, whatever, and she can push her face into a cake and like open like a couple presents, she’s like happy as a clam. Like, and not that like we had a, like there’s no judgment there cause like we, we’ve done the same thing. It’s just um, it’s, we just get caught up in it. Yeah,

Speaker 1 (25:03):

I think we do. I I, my middle just turned six, which is blowing my mind last week and she was crazy, right? I know she was having, she was just acting like not herself kind of all week leading up to her party. And I started to think as she got closer she kept feeling like Saturn and sadder and I’m like, I think she’s feeling the same way I’m feeling, I have social anxiety and when I have to host a party with like parents, I don’t know that well, I’m just dreading it and I’m like getting crankier <laugh> as the day. Like I’m just not, that’s just not my comfort zone. And so then I’m like, wait, she’s feeling this too. Like this is not what she wants to be doing and so why are we doing this? We’re just doing this cuz everyone else does.

Speaker 2 (25:48):

It’s hard.

Speaker 1 (25:49):

It’s just, it’s a lot. It’s just too much. I know. Well and we’re talking about like how moms rule the world because we really do, I was talking to my husband, he was hiring somebody who was looking for someone for his business. I’m like, you have to hire a mom. And once he started like looking at his roster, he was like, holy shit, you’re right. Like moms get shit done. Like that’s what we do. Like can motherhood be on the resume?

Speaker 2 (26:16):

I’ve been talking to so many moms recently, like about the like it’s like we had so much shit done and then there’s such a, you know, cause I, I’ve talked to a lot of moms who are kind of like, should I stay at work? Should I like, you know, take a break or whatnot or, or try this other thing. And there’s like such a fear that if we like get out, no one’s gonna like value our time and it it, which is like substantiated cuz it is like, it’s like once you get out is it’s hard to get back in or, or you know, on your resume. People, employers don’t necessarily, but I’m like, that’s so silly because I love having like moms on my team, they’re the most efficient. They make the culture so nice because there’s like a level of like caring and like, you know, a lot of the stuff that why people started leaving the workforce during covid. There’s like level of understanding. There’s just like, we get shit done. It’s

Speaker 1 (27:05):

So true. Yeah. If, if there’s a gap in your resume, put motherhood down and then put everything you did because you’re managing people, you’re managing expenses, households, you’re multitasking like crazy, you’re on deadlines, schedules,

Speaker 2 (27:21):

It’s so, so much. And if you do it full-time, it is just like, it’s more than a full-time job. It is like two jobs because it’s like 24 cent, you know, like a nine to five whatever. You’re at work and then you’re not like, you know, and like you might still have to answer emails and stuff like that, but this is like full-time physical, mental. It doesn’t stop.

Speaker 1 (27:44):

Yeah. Especially like after the pandemic and the pandemic response. Like what moms were tasked with, what we were assumed that we would do. And then in many cases we did it like at the cost of our mental health. Like that’s Yeah, we’re superheroes.

Speaker 2 (28:01):

Insane. Yeah, we became teachers like <laugh> working, watching kids, like everything. It was crazy. Um, also just the mental load of the decisions. Like do I send my kid to school and like if I don’t, will they like be behind and all this stuff? Or do I risk like the

Speaker 1 (28:19):

Yes

Speaker 2 (28:20):

So much

Speaker 1 (28:21):

And the mental load of now even covid still around in the past three years and like having to manage through that. And it’s like now if there’s a cough in the house, it’s like, okay, how are we gonna deal with this? Like, especially if you have multiple kids. Like if one of my kids goes down, like I have to then extrapolate that out into my entire family and I have to think about three weeks ahead, okay, what do we have coming? What do I have to cancel, what do I have to reschedule? Because I know each member of the family’s going down, but it’s gonna take about two to three weeks. <laugh>,

Speaker 2 (28:52):

It’s the worst. That’s a, we had covid run through, we’ve had like r s v, like all those, like a stomach, any of those things like oh

Speaker 1 (28:59):

My god. Ugh.

Speaker 2 (29:00):

And you’re just like, you see it coming and you’re like gonna get hit by that for Yeah. And it’s like, it goes and someone always like, I always am like the last one hit for some reason by then everyone’s like moved on and like, yes. You know, and you’re, nobody has sympathy. Like my husband’s always somewhere in the middle and like when he’s down for the count, like,

Speaker 1 (29:18):

Oh my god, they’re useless.

Speaker 2 (29:19):

He’s not helping no <laugh>, he’s useless. He’s like checking himself into the er cuz he’s gonna die from like <laugh> the same symptoms the rest of us have. But yeah.

Speaker 1 (29:30):

And he gets to just like hole up and then like we get to like wait on him and I’m like, dude, what? And you just know it’s coming for you. It’s like a heat-seeking missile and it’s like headed your way and you’re like, God, I have to give you guys all this sympathy and I know I’m going down and I’m gonna be on my own. Like,

Speaker 2 (29:47):

Oh, it’s always when you have something like it’s, it’s like it’s never convenient.

Speaker 1 (29:52):

No, it’s never convenient. Okay, so before we talk about sobriety a little bit, I hate mom hack, like I hate that term because I’m not a hacky mom, but there are things that I do to make mom life easier. What are just some things you do to make mom life easier and working mom life easier?

Speaker 2 (30:10):

Well, one thing I started doing, three really rocked to me, I have to say three is like a lot. I’ve always wanted a lot of kids, but three also coincided with like, kind of the world opening up and having to be back in the office. So I think I’m like still adjusting to that. But I wake up, I started like in the new year, I decided I was gonna wake up before my kids, which means I have to wake up at like 5, 5 30 the latest because they’re just unpredictable when they’ll get up. And that like is do like, it’s hard like especially in winter, I just wanna get back in bed and I’m not like that pop out of bed person. But it’s really helped because I just feel like it gives me that time to like get ready. Cuz even if I’m not going the office, like to like finish packing the bags and stuff, make sure everything’s like ready to go.

(30:54)
Like have some coffee, you know, I usually like will fire off like the first morning email so I don’t feel like I’m starting it like a deficit. Like after I, or trying to like answer emails and slacks while like, I’m like trying to get the kids out the door and just kind of get some things done. And regardless of what it is, I just feel like, I feel like, you know, if I’m gonna post something on Instagram, like whatever, it just makes me feel like, okay, I got some things off my to-do list. Like I’m ready to start the day sometimes like I’ll do a workout or like a shower, like something so like, then like when the kids are like out and like the chaos starts, I’m not like, ah, like, or trying to do like, like trying to do a hundred things at once was so hard. Our mornings like were so traumatic and that’s, it was like I’d come out like off to drop off and be like, like traumatized. Totally. Um, and I’m sure they were, they were probably too. So that’s really helped. It just, it really does like help. Like you just feel like you had a head start on your day. Cause like we all know there are just not enough hours.

Speaker 1 (31:53):

Oh my God, totally.

Speaker 2 (31:54):

Like as I said, like I try and automate as much, like in theory, like I’d love to go to the grocery store and like get ideas for food and stuff like that. I, we get our groceries delivered if something runs out like the second, like I see it, like I just like open my app, add it to the list and then when I like, you know, by the time the week’s ready, like to, you know, press like schedule out the grocery delivery, that’s done. I rely on like Amazon Prime. Like I don’t run out to store of get diapers. I just like prime that stuff. So that’s like really helpful. And then like, I did take some things off my list. Like, I was like, I’m gonna like cook for my family. Like, that’s really important to me. And like, I can’t cook. It’s, it’s not like I haven’t, I don’t try like, I just, I don’t have the bandwidth and it happens to be like it from five to seven.

(32:40)
I feel like shit always hits the fan at work. Um, there’s always something like last like minute to wrap up or whatever. I’m just like usually walking in the door or like coming down from like working from home, but also like trying to wrap stuff up. The kids are like, just like, that’s like the witching hour or whatever and just crazy and hungry and like, I don’t know. And so I just like, I just don’t cook, like try and cook. Um, so we get like, you know, pre-made meals or like I’ll, you know, we do other things and I’m like gonna, that’s how we’re gonna handle it because it’s too much. I think the pandemic made me think that I could be like a working mom and a like how like a stay-at-home mom and like I I, I’d always have this like inner battle of like, which I wanted to be.

(33:25)
And I think like I, now I can be both. Like, this is like wonderful and like I really took it like, I’m gonna do both and like, I’m gonna do all of the things. Like I’m gonna homeschool and like be on Zoom. I was like on Zoom calls with like baby and the baby you are like, at some point like my husband’s like, you’re gonna have a mental breakdown. Like, you can’t like what? Like right. You know, like there was a period where we had to do that and then we kind of came out of it and it was like, we need, like we need help. Like if you work full-time, you need like help, um, somebody to watch your kids in some form and you know, and, and like I can’t be making every meal like from scratch and like there’s certain things like I can’t, you know, be the Pinterest mom and that’s like, okay. So there’s like, I outsource the things like that that it’s just like right now it’s not like maybe when my kids are a little older and like they’re sitting around doing homework when I can cook or something. Like I’ll try it. But for now that’s just like not in the card. So like, I think also just like figuring out what you can like let go of sometimes. Like you just have to divert resources to that and like it’s worth it. Um, so that,

Speaker 1 (34:28):

Oh totally. It’s just like at the workplace, right? Like you have to delegate and like in motherhood, I think we judge ourselves so much when we delegate, but it’s like, it’s the, it’s the same thing. We can’t do everything. We can’t be everywhere and so we have to delegate.

Speaker 2 (34:45):

It was just like, this is not like worth it. Like this whole like, you know, like I’d be like answering calls this like something be birdy like, you know, the kids are running around. It’s like, no, like this isn’t gonna work. It’s not physically possible.

Speaker 1 (34:58):

Well I love that realization and just the idea that like sometimes I’ll think to myself like it’s just not the season for that. Yes. And so like, it’s just maybe in the future I’ll wanna do that or maybe in the future I’ll be able to be consistent about something that I wanna be. But it’s just not the season for that. And while this feels like it’s gonna last forever, it’s not. And so yeah.

Speaker 2 (35:20):

Yeah. I love that. I’ve been thinking I don’t, somebody said that like a season to me about something and that’s really helped me too. I think. Like I always just think of things in seasons. Like this is a particularly hard one, you know, when the kids are really young and I’m trying to like do things and whatnot. Like it’s just a season or like I even take it like this week has been really busy. I’ve been, you know, I’ll be out of the house more and at work more cause it’s like fashion week and all of these things for work, but I’m like, you know what, I’m gonna balance it out. And then like, then the kids have like another break cuz like, they’re never in school. So like <laugh>, then I’m like, I’ll ha I’m taking that week off to be with them. So like, yeah, it’s just gonna like, just kind of knowing like this is like the busy week or season like that’s like gonna be the less and like it will even itself out. But to try and like control it is like, this is like all the things at once is just, we can’t

Speaker 1 (36:11):

Totally. No we can’t. And that’s totally okay. And okay, so when I asked you to be on the podcast, you said, I’m not technically sober, but I don’t drink a lot. So let’s talk about, because this is the sober mom life, what is your relationship with alcohol and how did it change with motherhood?

Speaker 2 (36:30):

Well, so like when I was younger and like my twenties and stuff, I like went out and I partied a lot. Hell yeah. And so I, I drank a lot <laugh>, I lived it up. Like, I was like newly in magazines. I was like going to like, you know, clubs and you know, like whatnot. Um, but I always kind of like, I feel like I had like an all or nothing switch with alcohol. Like, I’d either be like, you know, completely like wasted blackout drunk, like, or like sober. And so I didn’t really have that, you know, like, I don’t know that mechanism of like just have like a couple drinks, feel tipsy and go home or have like a drink unwind and like, you know. And so I think like, you know, I’ve had, um, alcoholism has like run in my family and so I think I was like kind of aware like as I got, you know, like older of that.

(37:20)
And then like as I progressed in my career, I wasn’t like going out during the week. I was like working like crazy and like really just like, you know, trying to get ahead. So I think like I, I just slowly kind of like, you know, stopped like going out like that and drinking as much. And then like, you know, when we go to things like, you know, it was kind of like, what do I have the next day or whatnot. So like naturally I think life started to, you know, I got older, I got less school. Yeah, <laugh>. But you know, motherhood really changed it because like, once I was pregnant, I wasn’t drinking, my husband stopped drinking a little bit before I got pregnant and he kind of, you know, just I think also saw kind of like that he was kind of like on a, you know, like slippery. So he decided that he wanted to take a break and then I got pregnant. So it was kind of nice because like we were sober buddies together.

Speaker 1 (38:09):

Yeah, that’s nice.

Speaker 2 (38:10):

I didn’t have to be like the pregnant woman, like looking at everyone like, <laugh>, what are you people doing? And so then after I had my son, I breastfed him and I did not like have an easy kind of journey with that. It like took a while to like figure it out. And so like, I wasn’t gonna like pump and dump like, I was like, this is like, yeah. Yeah. Every ounce was like hard worn. Um, and I was too tired really. So I think I just like slowly like wasn’t really drinking. And then, um, you know, I’ve just like, haven’t really like picked it back up. I’ve never been one to like come home from work and have like a glass of wine. Like I sort of, you know, as I said had, you know, like alcohols run in my family and I’ve sort of been like really, like not deliberately cautious, like not like this is a decision I’m making for my life.

(38:57)
I think I just like naturally just like never was like that. And so, yeah, I think like as we’ve had more kids, like, you know, like if I go to a wedding, like I’ll have a couple drinks. I’ve never been like, I’m not drinking. I just, even if when we go out like to dinners with friends, I think a lot of parents are like, woo, like no kids. And I’m like, I don’t know, like I have to get up with these guys tomorrow. Like, so like right. I’ll have like my husband jokes cuz like I’ll order a glass of wine and have like two sips. But

Speaker 1 (39:25):

Yeah, you’re like, the kids still exist. Like they’re at home, they’re waiting for me. <laugh>, that’s

Speaker 2 (39:30):

What you get from me. Like, I like being in control. And so that’s probably why I used to be like an all or nothing when I was like in my college, like early twenties days and yeah. So I just like, I think naturally like I just like have progressed to like, not really, you know, it’s not a big part of my life, but, you know, I think I relate to a lot of what you say because you know, there is like such, I think there’s like a really strong mom culture. Like, especially during like, maybe it got like accentuated during the pandemic or maybe we just like did it on the internet more so like, then it became like maybe we were always doing it. I don’t know. But I do feel like it’s almost like sometimes I, I joke like, I feel like when you’re in college or like brushing a wording, they’re like, drink, drink, drink. Like, I feel like there’s, you know, people are always like, have another drink, like, come on. And, you know, I’m like, guys, like I gotta get up at like 6:00 AM tomorrow with like a baby and then be on like all day. So like, that’s not happening for me.

Speaker 1 (40:24):

Totally. I think your story is so important to tell because I think that it’s really common and like in motherhood, I think we’re, if you look on social media or walk down the target aisle and you see like that alcohol is being pushed as this solution to all of our problems in motherhood, I think a lot of moms are trying to figure out where it fits. And the overall picture is that for most moms, it just doesn’t, it’s just not a good fit just by design, by like what it is. And so this idea that you’re kind of just like phasing it out because your life is so big and like you’re just all of the things and the people that, that make up your life are just too important to have alcohol fit into it. I love that idea that it’s not like a no, I’m not drinking, I’m sober, you know, this is something that I’m battling or something, but it’s just a like, hey, this doesn’t really fit with my life now. And I was a party girl in my twenties too, and I gotta say it was fun. I’m glad I was a party girl.

Speaker 2 (41:29):

Same. I gotta like, I did it and like, I’m glad, yes. I also like could deal with doing nothing all day on like Saturday or Sunday or like, actually like, I think I was like, fine because you know, it hits a different when you’re older.

Speaker 1 (41:44):

Oh God. Yeah. Oof.

Speaker 2 (41:46):

<laugh>. But I was partying, like I wasn’t just going to dinner with friends and like getting, you know, like now I, it’s like sometimes like there’s parties like not like, you know, like my life is like lame. But I feel like there’s also like those people at those, you know, parties, like whether you’re at like a work event or like somebody’s birthday party or something and like the people or like something at the club, I don’t know, whatever. And there’s like those people that are just like completely out of their minds. Like they’re, you know, like speaking gibberish. Yes. And I was just like, you’re like an adult. Like, I don’t know, like, and I’m not judging cause like I always think, you know, like, I’m like, what? Well you do you like, I think everyone you have to do you. But I’m like, I don’t wanna be that person. Like

Speaker 1 (42:26):

Yes. And it is like an outgrowing, it’s like, okay, I did that in my twenties and it probably wasn’t even cute in my twenties when I did it, but I was that person in my twenties <laugh>. And so like, I, yeah. Like I did that and been there. Well I love that you have this like, powerful glamorous job and that you would think, you know, glamorous like New York City Publishing magazine like that it would be kind of alcohol drenched maybe, but that’s not the case. That’s not the reality.

Speaker 2 (42:57):

I have to say, like, I think a lot of people I work with are probably maybe similar. Um, there, when I first started, I started at Vanity Fair and like people were drinking. I mean it was like back in the like, you know, day like writers would take us out and like there was drinking and alcohol and drugs. So

Speaker 1 (43:13):

Like what year was that?

Speaker 2 (43:14):

That was like 2006, seven. Like that kind of era. That was like still like the era of like Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, like ugh,

Speaker 1 (43:23):

The golden age

Speaker 2 (43:24):

<laugh>. Yeah. Like Jennifer Aniston and like Brad Pitt had just split up. It was like, oh

Speaker 1 (43:29):

God, take me back.

Speaker 2 (43:30):

I know. Um, so there was definitely like that thing, but I think now, like most women, like, you know, I remember like I worked for that editor-in-chief of glamor and like stuff, and like she went to all these glamorous parties, but like you stop in, you do your thing and you leave like it’s part of your job and like part of your job is to like present a certain way. So like getting like really drunk and like things like, that’s not like part of it. Yeah. Even like when we had our holiday party and stuff like that. Like, it’s not like that. And I, I think we’re all just like really, you know, busy and people, you know, a lot of people I work with, these are like, you wake up really early in the morning and you like hit the gr you know, like, I’m not too, too sadly, like it was not my genius idea to wake up before the kid. Like, you know, a lot of my colleagues work up, wake up super early and you know, are doing stuff. So I think it’s the same, you know, thing. Um, and I think there is like kind of like that idea of like, it’s gonna be more glamorous or fun with like, I don’t know. Um,

Speaker 1 (44:25):

No, but it makes sense. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (44:27):

Yeah. But I don’t know, like I’ll order that glass of wine, but like, as I said, like my husband jokingly, I’ll have a couple sips and then it’s like,

Speaker 1 (44:34):

Yeah. You know? Yeah. You guys like the successful, powerful people, like aren’t drinking themselves to a stupor. Like J Lo doesn’t drink guys.

Speaker 2 (44:43):

<laugh> actually a lot of celebs that are like really power, you know, like I I I’ve seen a lot of celebs on the other end, but like, they usually head to rehab or like have like a set, you know, they, the ones who are like the JLo’s, the ones who are crushing it, like the Jessica elbows, like the Gweneth, like who are, you know, like they have, you know, like they’ll all say like, I indulged in my, you know, like wine or whatever. And like Gwen Gweneth will have her cleanse stuff, but they all quit, you know, like they don’t drink.

Speaker 1 (45:10):

You guys see

Speaker 2 (45:12):

And they lead. It shows like, and I think a lot of like powerful seo, like, you know, CEOs and stuff like that, a lot of them don’t drink you. You think it, it’s like a certain way, but it’s not. Um, and I think that like enables them to like be on top of their shit and like be have a clear head

Speaker 1 (45:29):

Totally.

Speaker 2 (45:30):

And to like, have like, you know, balance all those things. So, you know, like when I was younger I was always like taking notes like, okay, what does he do? Like I’m gonna get up early early and I’m gonna like, you know, meditate or like whatever. But I think that’s like a, an underlying thing that I’ve really like realized is like a lot of executives and stuff, they don’t.

Speaker 1 (45:47):

Yeah. I love that. That’s amazing. Wait, have you met Gwyneth Paltrow?

Speaker 2 (45:52):

I have. I have like, but a, a while ago. Um, really? And she’s, I just, I mean, I know like I I just love her. Um, I always did.

Speaker 1 (46:02):

Yeah. She’s like polarizing. I love her. So I don’t want her to be relatable, like, have loved her since seven, since one was at like 1996. Like, oh, she’s just my top. I

Speaker 2 (46:13):

Always wanted to be her. Like, I loved her style. She’s so beautiful in person and she’s, she’s actually like, she’s really cool. Like, she’s just so cool and she’s not like, what you think? She’s not this like pretentious like walk in the, like I’ve been around like people who are like, you know, like have rules about who can look at them. Oh

Speaker 1 (46:33):

Wait, who? You can’t tell us. Can you?

Speaker 2 (46:36):

I I can’t say

Speaker 1 (46:37):

<laugh>. Could you tell me after

Speaker 2 (46:39):

<laugh> they’ll be like, you know, you can can only have this kind of like snack Yeah. Flowers. Like people can be crazy.

Speaker 1 (46:45):

Oh my God. Like the riders,

Speaker 2 (46:47):

You know, especially at that like level fate. Yeah. And like she’s just really cool. Like, I don’t know to Do you call her on Instagram now? I feel like she does Q and As and I’m like, yes, I just love you. You’re so awesome. Like

Speaker 1 (46:59):

Cool. I know she gets a bad rap because they’re some of her go stuff, but I’m like, you guys lay off Gwyneth like she is, she can do no wrong. I love her. Who has been like your favorite celebrity that you met or that you’ve interviewed?

Speaker 2 (47:11):

Huh? I really like Reese Witherspoon too. She is like such a boss lady, but she’s also just like such a sweet, cool person. There’s so many like, um, I don’t know, like at different times, like Harry Styles and One Direction came in when they were like little babies.

Speaker 1 (47:29):

Really? Was it like the hair time when he was like, oh yes. Crazy hair.

Speaker 2 (47:35):

They were so cute. They like sat. I remember one of them sat at my desk and like, I was like, oh, you’re so cute.

Speaker 1 (47:41):

<laugh>. Oh my god.

Speaker 2 (47:42):

You know Sam Hugin from Outlander?

Speaker 1 (47:44):

Oh my God. Wow.

Speaker 2 (47:46):

That was like when I met, he was doing a shoot, he was actually doing a shoot for I think Esquire, part of a Herst family. So it’s in the same building. And I was like, I’m going that shoot. I’m sorry, I’m going <laugh>. And I was like, this is like the one guy where like I told my husband like, you know, he was so funny and he was so lovely and he has like that accent and stuff and he is so lovely.

Speaker 1 (48:05):

Oh my

Speaker 2 (48:06):

God. But I was like, oh yeah.

Speaker 1 (48:08):

Do you still get starstruck when you meet them

Speaker 2 (48:11):

Sometimes? Yeah. I think like, it’s so funny because I think it’s like everything, like everything looks so glamorous and whatnot, but it’s, nothing’s as glamorous as it looks. I think celebrity life is really lonely, so they always like come in and a lot of them feel like how we probably like, feel like I have an outward facing job, but I’m like a very big introvert. And so I think a lot of celebrities are like that. Like they can turn it on like for the camera and stuff, but like, they’re expected to like go all these places and be a certain way. And like they don’t have, they show up with like their publicist and whatever. And there’s like, you know, 50 people in the room, like looking to shoot style, like whatever them, and it’s funny, like sometimes they just like kind of wanna be your friend, like

Speaker 1 (48:50):

Yeah, they wanna like connect actually.

Speaker 2 (48:53):

Yeah, they’re like on tour or they’re doing like, you know, the rounds for like, publicity things. There’s a lot to like, the job that’s like not super glamorous and of course lots of cool parts too. Um, but a lot of them, like, they’re just like the rest of us. Um, you know, like everything looks so glamorous, but like, they have insecurities or they have kids that they’re like FaceTiming with or bringing to the set, or they had like a really late night, the night before filming and they had to get up and they have like dark circles and they have to like, go on camera and that sucks. You know? Like, I wouldn’t wanna do that either, so.

Speaker 1 (49:26):

Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (49:28):

I don’t know. It the bubble, like his kind of burst for me. I think like you always like, are like, I would love to do that. And there’s so many parts of it, like, yes, I’d love to live in like, Malibu and like a crazy house and like, there’s like a lot of, you know, stuff about being, you know, famous and stuff that’s like amazing.

Speaker 1 (49:44):

I don’t think, no, I would not wanna do it.

Speaker 2 (49:47):

It’s a job. It is a full-time job too, and it has its own, you know, it’s own thing. So,

Speaker 1 (49:53):

And talk about judgment, poof. Like no thanks.

Speaker 2 (49:56):

You can do no. Like, if you have kids and you’re a celebrity, you better never do anything in public because everyone will judge like, shame you no matter what you do.

Speaker 1 (50:05):

Oh man. No thank you. No thank you. Oh my God. Oh, Kristen, I love this. I wanna talk to you again and more and I want, like, I wanna see a day in your life. It just seems like, so, I don’t know. It, it seems exciting, but I, I am glad that you kind of broke down the glamor of it and you guys, nothing is as glamorous as it seems.

Speaker 2 (50:29):

Nothing. Nothing. Um, it is, it’s always like a crazy this that, and like, it just, things get done, but I think it’s important. Like, we have these conversations and that I felt like, you know, like sometimes in my Instagram I’m like, Shirley even be talking about this. But I feel like there’s like a kind of whole of people, you know, kind of talking about that struggle of being like a working mom and all moms are working moms. So I think in any, you know, thing, but like, yeah, there’s a lot of like, you know, the glamor from like the influencers and stuff kind of like you’re doing here of like, talking about sobriety, like, and other thing. And like the things we don’t show when we’re not like being like, I gone through it with wine. Like that’s my, you know, like, yes. There is like that, like real life to it. And then I think connecting through it all, like, I have so many friends who are crazy amazing jobs or like glamorous jobs or who like, you know, have like the perfect, like Instagram life. Like you’re just like, everyone looks so perfect and you like, keep your house so nice and like you’re like the perfect stay-at-home mom of, you know, slash running like your side business at the same time. Like, and they’re all struggling, like, we’re all drowning.

Speaker 1 (51:38):

Totally. It’s just not real. And I think, yeah,

Speaker 2 (51:41):

It’s not real.

Speaker 1 (51:42):

It’s not real. And I think we do a disservice to moms when we don’t talk about that, especially to new moms who are like, oh, I thought it was gonna be this way. Why is it this way? I’m doing something wrong and you’re not doing anything wrong.

Speaker 2 (51:56):

No, you need to like, be like, this is gonna be the hardest thing you’ll ever do. Like going back to work after you have a kid, or like, welcome your first kid adding a second. Like, these things are like the hardest thing. Each stage is hard. But I think if I was mentally prepared for that and someone was like, it’s hard. Like, it’s supposed to be hard because it is hard. Like this is like, we don’t have the village to help us all. Like, we don’t have, like childcare is like a crap show. And even if you have good childcare, you feel guilty. If somebody had just said that to me, I would’ve been like, but instead I, I always felt something was wrong with me. And I still do, like half the time I’m like, something’s wrong with me. And like sometimes my husband’s like, I’m supposed like, you can’t do all that. Or like, I don’t care what they’re valentine. Like, I sent Charlotte to school, I’m like a backward shirt. And like, I couldn’t, like, I couldn’t care less. And I’m like, what? She like would, you know? So

Speaker 1 (52:47):

Yes,

Speaker 2 (52:48):

I think it’s like you need people to be like, yeah, we’re all, it’s hard for all of us. So like, you’re not doing something wrong. I’m not doing something wrong. It’s, it’s hard.

Speaker 1 (52:57):

Yes. Let’s just remember that it’s hard and if it’s hard, that doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. That means you’re just awake

Speaker 2 (53:05):

<laugh>. I know, I like hate to say cause it’s feels like depressing and some people

Speaker 1 (53:09):

Are, I’m like, like we’re ending. I

Speaker 2 (53:10):

Don’t have like an answer. Like, I can’t tell you like, oh, this is how you make it like easy or glamorous or anything. It’s like, I, I don’t really actually have it. Um, nobody does, but like I’ve, you know, last tidbit, but I’ve seen like celebrities who have kids who have a nanny for each kid, like a housekeeper, like all of the things for them who are having trouble with it. So, you know, those things make it a lot easier. And like, I won’t like sugarcoat like any of those things. Like much easier to do that, you know, I don’t have all that, but like, I know and they will admit that, but it’s still hard for them. And so it’s, you know, for people who don’t have all that or who are like, sorry, you know, like force it’s even harder. So, but you know, we’re incredible as you said. So we just, like, every day you just, you have the hardest day yesterday and you get up and you put one foot in front of the other, do it again and again. And somehow

Speaker 1 (54:06):

It’s so true. And I think the only thing that makes it easier is connecting with other moms and being able to like say, to have a mom friend or this podcast or listen to someone that says like, yeah, it’s hard for me too. And that does make us feel like, okay, so it’s not me, you know, it’s just the gig. It’s just the gig is hard. It’s just gig. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (54:27):

Yeah. That’s like having mom friends. I think like whether it’s in I r L or like in the Instagram or whatever can be TikTok, whatever community. It’s like, it’s so like, even once, I don’t even like connect with like personally, but I just follow them and like laugh at their memes about how life are, it just helps so much. Like there’s a lot that goes with social media that can, you know, like obviously puts pressure on us and things like that. But that’s one part where it’s just like, thank you, thank you for like, I’m like, yes, I connect to that. Like I, I feel like I’m like that annoying person now who like shares like all the memes, you know, like just like reposts them, which like obviously should not do Instagram hates everything we do, but

Speaker 1 (55:06):

I know <laugh> Instagram just hates us anyway.

Speaker 2 (55:08):

But I’m like, this is so funny. This is me. This is me.

Speaker 1 (55:11):

<laugh>. No, it’s so true. It’s just like, I always get the best response when I’m just sharing something like a struggle. We connect with people through our struggles and like once we say our struggles out loud, people are like, yeah, I’ve been feeling the same way. And there’s nothing that feels better when you’re finally brave enough to be like, okay, I am think I’m failing as a mom. And then you have hundreds of moms saying, oh my god, me too. And you’re like, oh, okay, well if we’re all failing then we have to be doing okay <laugh>.

Speaker 2 (55:40):

A hundred percent. And

Speaker 1 (55:41):

Cuz we’re not all failing guys. We are not failing at all. Ugh. Kristen, thank you so much. Tell everybody where you, where they could find you. I love your Instagram because you guys, she has the coolest mom style on Instagram,

Speaker 2 (55:56):

So you can follow me. Kristen m Kennedy on Instagram. And now I’m starting to play around on TikTok, but,

Speaker 1 (56:03):

Ooh,

Speaker 2 (56:04):

Sound of embarrassing, but trying to new TikTok, that’s really big for us at 17, so I’m like, let me, let me get on

Speaker 1 (56:10):

There. Yeah. You gotta get in with the Gen Z.

Speaker 2 (56:12):

Yeah. And I run a lifestyle blog that I started before I ever took this job called closet fold clothes. It started as like a fashion blog, but now it’s like, just really like all the,

Speaker 1 (56:23):

I love it

Speaker 2 (56:24):

That I have passions about outside of, um, my day job.

Speaker 1 (56:28):

Yeah. Not that you have like free time or anything, you’re just, you’re like, I’m gonna do a blog too. That’s amazing. <laugh>.

Speaker 2 (56:35):

Yeah. Like why sleep

Speaker 1 (56:37):

<laugh>. Yeah. Why sleep? Who needs sleep? No, you are incredible. You are so inspiring. Thank you so much for being here.

Speaker 2 (56:44):

Thank you so much for having me. I love this podcast and I’m so honored to be on it.

Speaker 1 (56:48):

Oh, thanks. Thank you so much for listening to this episode of The Silver Mom Life. If you loved it, please rate and review it wherever you listen. Five stars is amazing. Also, follow me on Instagram at the silver Mom life. Okay, I’ll see you next week. I’m gonna go reheat my coffee. Bye.

Speaker 3 (57:19):

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Speaker 1 (57:20):

So that we can tell people about brand new information, a pop culture and political podcast.

Speaker 3 (57:26):

Say it in a way that doesn’t sound like game show

Speaker 1 (57:28):

Host. Okay. Do you wanna be in a room of overeducated douche bags and feel comfortable? Brand new information is for you.

Speaker 3 (57:36):

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Speaker 1 (57:44):

Yeah, we might not break the political and pop culture news of the week,

Speaker 3 (57:48):

But we put it right back together for you.

Speaker 1 (57:50):

That’s right. Listen, wherever you find your favorite podcasts.

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